pause.
piecing together who i used to be and who i am now. who am i, really? the girl who claimed to rule the kingdom of snow? the subjects never mastered obedience so how could i rule? the snow kingdom, my heart, my sanity. keeping close watch. keeping cold. i let go. i decided that was best. i can't shut everyone out and stay frozen forever. live and learn, right? waste time and get wasted, right?

i'm not so sure.

but now, lesson's learned. let go of control. i can't know everything. i can't predict everything. stop and enjoy the unknown.

i may not be the dark song they sing. i left that behind. i can truly say that in this moment i am not waiting, i am not wasting. summer bled to autumn and the leaves all fell and scattered, as they always do. i grew colder with the steady approach of winter. everything died and i retreated. step back and wait, little one, colder times are always ahead. pause.
ice melted away and the seasons changed yet again. who are you, really?
i'm not standing with outstretched arms, i'm not satisfied by the sensation of fingertips. i'm not the monster.witch.queen. i was, i don't wish for their demise. i don't wish for their acknowledgment or repentance. i'm not fit to condemn.

pause.

who am i, really?
i'm learning again.